This week as I’ve been preparing for the Building Relationships To Build Your Business Workshop which I am hosting this weekend, I got to thinking about the relationship between trust and respect.  Trust and respect are foundations of building great relationships whether in life or business, but how do these apply to leaders?.

Can you trust someone you don’t respect?  Can you respect without trust? In all my years of being in business I can’t recall anyone that I really respected and who I didn’t trust. Although recently I did come across a stallion horse that I certainly respected for his power and presence, but to be honest I didn’t really trust him. In fact he intimidated me, and I was a little afraid, however I did trust myself that I knew enough to keep me safe by keeping him out of my personal space.

So whilst trust and respect can exist independently, it’s when they co-exist together that something magical happens.  It is definitely a case of 1+1=3.

So let’s be clear on what are trust and respect. Trust is defined as reliance on the integrity, strength, ability, surety, etc., of a person or thing whilst respect is defined as a deep admiration for someone’s abilities, qualities or achievements.

So how do you build trust and respect with others?  Here are six practices you can engage with:

1. Model The Way

“What you do speaks so loudly I cannot hear what you say. “ ~ Ralph Waldo Emerson

Both trust and respect are earned.  The fastest way to earn them is to give them:  Show others trust, give others respect.

 2. Keep Your Commitments

Do what you say you will do.  So if you agree to follow up with someone then make sure you do it. This builds credibility and shows you are reliable. And if for some reason circumstances change make sure you circle back and explain why you can no longer keep this commitment and ask to be released from your original promise.

3. Listen To Communicate

Being a great communicator means listening with your mind as well as your heart. What is being communicated by what isn’t being said? Listen to people and consider what they have to say with an open mind. Great communicators address both the “why” and the “how” of the situation. Trust your gut and learn to ask great questions.

4. Prepare for Confidence

Respect is born through the competence you show, one of the 5 pillars of trust.  (The 5 pillars are Caring, Commitment, Consistency, Competence and Communication)  Have the confidence born of knowledge and experience. When you speak, know what you are talking about.  Remember, though: confidence is not arrogance; a confident leader is willing to admit his mistakes; hiding them is a sign of duplicity.

5. Make People Feel Safe

Create an environment where everyone feels that they can express their viewpoint.  Respected leaders acknowledge they don’t know everything and they can learn a lot from other people.  Keep an open mind and appreciate that  everyone has something to teach you.

6. Lead From The Front

Do you want trust and respect from others?  Start by trusting and respecting yourself.  It means not putting yourself down when you make a mistake; own up to it and move on.  Let yourself take risks based on your own values and strengths.  Listen to that “inner voice” guiding your decisions.

What else are you doing to build trust and respect? I’d love to hear as the same principles apply whether you are building trust and respect with prospects, clients, suppliers or even your horse.

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